Trump-Kim Summit - Play-by-Play

Trump: We will give you everything you want to get rid of all your nukes. Money, treaties, and our most formal agreement that we will never, ever, attack you or interfere in your country.  But you have to get rid of the nukes, that is non-negotiable. 

Kim: Ummm, how can I trust that you won't attack us one day. Can't the next US President just cancel this whole agreement...like you literally just did in Iran.

Trump: No, this will be different, believe me, this will be better. Did I mention we would lift all the sanctions, plus give you billions in aid. 

Kim: I really need to keep a few nukes, just in case Hillary becomes the next President. I need to project power in the world. You understand.

Trump: Well, I said that you would get rid of your nukes.  Did I mention that we would give you tens of billions of dollars in aid...But about those nukes

Kim: No, you said that we would get rid of our ability to make anymore nukes. That is how Fox News remembers it.  All the previous ones we built are Obama's fault.  No nukes under Trump, you will be a hero. You will be the greatest President ever.  You are so strong and tall and we will build a monument of you right next to the new North Korean Trump Towers buildings, which we will build for you and just give to you because you are so amazing. 

Trump:...What if we give you $100 billion?  It's not my money?

Kim: Come on, we keep the nukes, but make peace with everyone. You lift sanctions and we won't build anymore nukes. We will submit to any verification of this that you want.  You win!

Trump:....ummm, I can't can't to it.  How about if you get rid of the nukes that can reach the US?

Kim: Done and Done! 



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