Calling all gods, prophets, heroes, and cartoon ninja rodents

Dear Agdistis, Ah Puch, Ahura Mazda (the god, not the car), Akbar, Alberich, Amaterasu, Anshar, Anu, Aphrodite, Apollo (the god and the spaceship), Apsu, Ares, Artemis, Asclepius, Athena, Athirat, Athtart, Atlas, Baal, Bacchus, Balder, Bast, Bergelmir, Bes, Biff (the apostle), Bragi, Brahma, Brigit, Bruce (Lee and Leroy) Buddha, Camaxtli, Ceres, Ceridwen, Cernunnos, Chac, Chalchiuhtlicue, Charun, Clip-clop, Cybele, Dagon, Damkina, Davlin, Demeter, Diana, Dionysus, Don Corleone (Vito and Michael), Gonzo (the muppet and the doctor), Guan-yin, Ea, El, Ellis Boyd 'Red' Redding, Enki, Enlil, Epona, Ereskigal, Farbauti, Fenrir, Fluffy III, Forseti, Freya, Freyr, Frigg, Gaia, Ganesha, Ganga, Garuda, Gauri, Geb, George Burns, Hades, Hanuman, Helios, Hengo, Hephaestus, Hera, Hermes, Hestia, Hod, Hoderi, Hoori, Horus, Hotei, Huitzilopochtli, Hygeia, Inanna, Inti, Ishtar (the god not the movie), Isis, Ixtab, Izanaki, Izanami, Jebus, Jesus, Juno (the god not the internet provider), Jupiter, Kagutsuchi, Kartikeya, Khepri, Ki, Kingu, Kinich Ahau, Kishar, Krishna, Kukulcan, Lakshmi, Liza (the god, not the Minnelli), LL Cool J, Loki, Lugh, Magna Mater, Marduk, Mars (the god and the bar), Medb, Mercury, Mimir, Minerva, Ming, Miracle Max, Mithras, Mongo, Morrigan, Mr. T, Mot, Mummu, Mumra, Nammu, Nanna, Nanse, Nemesis, Nephthys, Neptune, Nergal, Ninazu, Ninhurzag, Nintu, Ninurta, Njord, Nut, Odin, Ohkuninushi, Ohyamatsumi, Orgelmir, Osiris, Ostara, Pan (the god and the peanut butter), Parvati, Poseidon (the god and the adventure), Quetzalcoatl, Rama, Re, Sammy David Jr., Sarasvati, Seshat, Seti, Shamash, Shapsu, Shiva, Shu, Sin, Splinter, Super (fly and man), Surya, Susanoh, Tawaret, Tefnut, Tezcatlipoca, Thor, Tiamat, Tlaloc, Tonatiuh, ToyoUkeBime, Trent (Reznor and Walker) Tyr, Utu, Uzume, Venus (the god, the Williams, but not the razor), Vesta, Vespa (the princess),Vishnu, Vonnegut, Vulcan, Xipe, Xochipilli, Xochiquetzal, Yam, Yarikh, Yeng-Wang-Yeh, Ymir, Yum Kimil, and Zeus,

Please, please let me get the apartment I want. Thank you.

Sincerely,
Dan

UPDATE! At 5:54, only 28 minutes after this was posted, I got a call from the apartment agent guy saying that deal is virtually a lock. We are just waiting for the owner's brother to agree. Still crossing my fingers, but it's looking good.

UPDATE! The deal fell apart. The owner's were very mean and tried to take advantage of me as well as the current tennant. I tried to be nice, but I can't talk to people who curse at me.

Comments

Glen Lipka said…
You missed Kokopelli. He is a Native American Hero/God who gives good luck and good furtune to the people. He is also god of fertility. He would come into town with his humped back and flute and seduce the women into letting him impregnant them. He was fertile.
12:29 PM
Anonymous said…
Kokopelli fertile? Just look at my sons!!!
12:32 PM
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