Vacation
Tomorrow I leave on a much needed, week-long vacation to Hawaii. I have high hopes for the week ahead and expect that all of my dreams will finally come true. Is that too much to expect?
In other news, 106 year old man, Harry Whittington, was shot in the face with an AK-47 while participating in a Scull & Crossbones ritual. The naked Whittington was being tarred and feathered when (after drinking a bottle of tequila), Dick Chaney mistaken thought that Whittington was Lewis “Scooter” Libby and decided to riddle him full of bullets. Luckily Whittington was wearing a bulletproof vest that Donald Rumsfeld had given him at a lobbying meeting last year. A drunken Cheney later told the press that “I thought it was a bird”. Cheney has left Washington to return to his home town in the center of the earth.
Reports are now saying that the gun was originally purchased by an ex-felon with no identification, except his NRA membership card. Additionally the bulletproof vest that Whittington was wearing was supposed to go to a marine in Iraq six months ago.
When President Bush was asked what he thought the whole incident, he responded that “That Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruction and in a post 9/11 world, we have to stop the terrorists.” When a reporter asked what that has to do with the incident Bush responded by saying that “My actions have lead to the deaths of thousands of people, why do you even care if Dick hurt some old man? We have to focus on the terrorists who I am killing. I am the real killer, of terrorists.”
In other news, 106 year old man, Harry Whittington, was shot in the face with an AK-47 while participating in a Scull & Crossbones ritual. The naked Whittington was being tarred and feathered when (after drinking a bottle of tequila), Dick Chaney mistaken thought that Whittington was Lewis “Scooter” Libby and decided to riddle him full of bullets. Luckily Whittington was wearing a bulletproof vest that Donald Rumsfeld had given him at a lobbying meeting last year. A drunken Cheney later told the press that “I thought it was a bird”. Cheney has left Washington to return to his home town in the center of the earth.
Reports are now saying that the gun was originally purchased by an ex-felon with no identification, except his NRA membership card. Additionally the bulletproof vest that Whittington was wearing was supposed to go to a marine in Iraq six months ago.
When President Bush was asked what he thought the whole incident, he responded that “That Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruction and in a post 9/11 world, we have to stop the terrorists.” When a reporter asked what that has to do with the incident Bush responded by saying that “My actions have lead to the deaths of thousands of people, why do you even care if Dick hurt some old man? We have to focus on the terrorists who I am killing. I am the real killer, of terrorists.”
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